I’m baffled

So, I’m sitting here shaking my head.  I’m wondering why people chose to do crazy things to lose weight?

Trust me – I’ve tried them all.  I’ve tried every tactic and trick in the book to lose weight QUICKLY.  However, this only happened AFTER I lost my 100lbs.  Can you believe that at 169lbs I still thought I was fat?  I still believed I had to lose more – I HAD JUST LOST 103lbs. But it’s because of society and my own self hatred that I felt the need to be THINNER.  NOW almost two years after I was my lowest weight, here I am frustrated and ready to get back at it again.

You know how many times I’ve restarted my weight loss over the last year?  Do you know how many times I wish I was where I was on May 2nd 2012? I just mentally yelled at myself to STOP BRINGING UP THE PAST!  Who CARES where I was back in 2012?  Since my weight loss journey I have become a more confident, stronger individual who now realize my weight dictates NOTHING!!!

I can be who I want to be RIGHT NOW!! As long as I have the passion and the determination to succeed – I will.

I’m not going to lie – I’m an emotional eater.  January 2013 my aunt passed away and then in July my Nan passed away.  I struggled so much when my Nan died.  Not that I didn’t (don’t) miss my Aunt… the passing of my Nan absolutely tore my heart out of my chest and devestated me.  I turned to food.  I was sad, I always cried and I pushed many of my friends and family away.

But everyone knows my story, everyone knows the struggles I’ve dealt with.  Everyone knows I’m once again overweight.

However, here’s the bright side – IM FINE WITH IT!! Well, not my weight per se, but.. I’m not going to let ANYTHING, ANYMORE dictate my success.  I’m not going to let certain individuals make me feel like crap anymore.

I am who I am.  I work hard, I believe in myself NOW and I’m ready to help others reach their weight loss goals WHILE working towards mine.  And I am no longer going to be worried that I’m being judged because I call myself a health coach.

I’m doing exactly what I want to do.  I’m running my own business.  I’m taking charge of my life.  I am, a health coach.

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